Armake21

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http://replay.web.archive.org/20100817230907/http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Armake21

 
 
I DO NOT WANT OR NEED DONATIONS.
 

 

—Armake21


 
 
I'm not buying Gears of War 2. If you want it reviewed by me, YOU, the demanders, will pay for it. Otherwise, it's NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN. Same goes for other piles of shit on DVD or Bluray. I'd rather not spend money on games I can't actually use after the review is done.
 

 

—Armake21, Contradicting himself on his own fucking Youtube channel

 
 
FUCKING DROP DEAD YOU FUCKIN CUNT!!! FUK U! IM FUKKIN DONE W/U FUKIN CUNTS ON LINE U FUKING EMO TISTIC FUCKING BITCHES WHO NEED A FUCKIN MANNNN.
 

 

—Armake21, charming the ladIes

 
 
This is a lonely guy in a wheelchair. I fucking hate him. He's a fucking faggot.
 

 

—Armake21

Armakeboxwoes2.gifArmakeboxwoes2.gifArmakeboxwoes2.gifArmakeboxwoes2.gifArmakeboxwoes2.gifArmakeboxwoes2.gifArmakeboxwoes2.gif


When not leading the Brotherhood of NOD, Kane has been known to rant on the internets against the abolition of tiberium by the oppressive forces of GDI.
Armake21's most successful video.

Armake21 AKA NicotineAlien theFAILSessions BoxedEntertainment21 TheWaste0Time (Real name: Umberto LaForge and then renamed Marcus Spiracio after he was adopted) is a vastly overrated, slap headed, hypocritical, egocentric 30-something-year-old, Limp Bizkit's Fred Dunts look-alike video game reviewer whom originated from JewTube.

He is instantly recognizable due to his irritating Rosie O'Donnell voice and his bizarre ability to grow hair on the wrong side of his head.

Armake21 decided to jump on the video game reviewing bandwagon after seeing how popular and rich the Angry Video Game Nerd was becoming and Being the money grabbing Jew that he is, also wanted a slice of the pie, but failed miserably. Marcus has since pointed said failings at everything from the Irate Gamer, to having an unhappy childhood, having his basement flooded several years ago, to being poor. Yet never realizing that it's actually because he can't review for shit and is fucking terrible.

When he's not reviewing games or begging for charitable donations (see below), Marcus SPAGETTIO likes to enjoy drawing pictures of little girls being tied up, convincing little girls he is tying them up and sexing them from several hundred miles away, sponging money from ripping off Irishmen to buy vastly overpriced Alienware PC's, throwing childish tantrums on U-Stream about his jealousy of more talented reviewers, sponging money from female video game reviewers, trying to weasel out of previous statements by saying he was drunk at the time, and sponging off you!!!


Typical Review by Armake21[edit]

This is the sort of brainwashing Armake does to his Fanboys... HE MUST BE STOPPED!!!
Armake21, drawing images of rape.
Did you know he converted to Islam?

The majority of Marcus' reviews involve him bitching about broken controls and game mechanics even though the video clearly shows that he plays like shit, probably because he didn't RTFM before playing. He also thinks that being an angry motherfucker who swears a lot is the result of "being in character" and "unique" rather than perpetuating the video game reviewer stereotype (all video game reviewers are 'required to swear and scream no less than 200 times a minute'). He very recently claimed to stop using this character, but we all know that's typical attention whore bullshit.

The Armake21 Pyramid Scheme Investment Program[edit]

Armake21 pretending he's AZN.

One day, after suffering from a severe head injury, Marcus came upon a brainwave...

He decided that if YouTube wouldn't pay him royalties for his high quality, entertaining works of brilliance, why not ask his legions of adoring fanboys to see if they'd care to invest in him instead? And thus Armake21's donation program was born.



So Why Should You Invest in Armake21 to make moar Reviews?[edit]

Armake in his bedroom,
with all the shit he leeched was kindly donated by his fans.

Because giving money to Armake21 is a much more worthwhile investment than giving it to a cancer charity, and also has the bonus effect of letting said cancer sufferers enjoy his video antics, as Marcus so valiantly claims in his excellent piece of videotography:


Someone Dareth Question Armake's Cancer Curing Videos[edit]

Last Thursday, Armake21 was pwned by some 13 year old JewTube nobody by the name of Gerthonex, The lulz flow like a waterfall.

Gerthonex responded to Armake's batshit insane claims that his videos cure cancer:


 
 
So, your telling me, cancer patients need laughter more then they need money to pay for medical bills? Or that I need laughter more than I need money to pay for food and living expenses? I hate to burst your bubble buddy, but laughter is nothing more than a distraction. Its a temporary cure to make you forget your troubles or ailments. TEMPORARY CURE. And I guarantee you that they'd rather survive there illness rather then "go out with a smile on there face." I've had family members who have died of cancer, and that statement makes me fucking sick.

And tell me, if Jericho was just in it "FOR TEH VIEWZZZ" why would he make annotations correcting his mistakes? And apparently your not understanding what I'M saying. Everyone has the right to donate there money to whatever cause they deem appropriate. But some causes are more worthy then others. Its fact, not opinion, that cancer research is more important them some random guy on YouTube.
 


 

—Gerthonex

Not being the WOP to back down, Armake21 responded with:

 
 
Those "annotations" as you mention, were added after I saw it. I watched it twice, on the day it was uploaded. I didn't since.

Secondly- There is no cure. It's a terminal illness and you will die. You can postpone it, and pretend it's fine, but facing the facts and doing what you can to enjoy the time you have left is the reality of it. People who can't do this, are afraid the innevitable, and how do I know that?

My real mother died of cancer. I barely knew her due to being adopted right after I was born, and the last thing she wanted, after telling me the same thing I just told you about facing it, was to make her smile and laugh. It's something you'll remember.

They didn't have a cure then, and they never will. I saw what it does, and I'm sure I'll find out myself since I smoke almost a pack a day. Even then, I'd rather die of it, but die laughing, then trying to keep my life going via any means available to me.

It's a temporary cure with tubes, needles, and pain, or to give someone an emotional reaction that isn't some canned bullshit. It's real, it comes from the heart, and anyone who is screaming at me for saying what I did, never considered anything but "OMG YOU CAN'T SAY THAT, IT ISN'T MORE IMPORTANT".

It is to me, and that was ME, not you- and not anyone else, and I'm being condemened based on opinions I MADE, that are MINE. Not YOURS.

Mine, and mine alone.

As for why he made those things, I would say for the same reason he has PM'd and talked to people about feeling bad or like he fucked up when calling me out over something so small, and yet never actually said anything to me. Instead of being an adult, he ran to others, and last time I checked, I respond to everyone, even those who are flat out telling me to drop dead.

That and I don't hate him, but apparently- if you raise your voice and talk from your own views, you do. Ironically, Goose colors me an asshole in 40 different ways in his latest two part video, and all of a sudden, doing what I did, is fine, and he isn't even trying to keep on track, he's being mean for the sake of derviving humor from me trying to explain something so others might understand where I was coming.

That was cold, the reception here is cruel, and I'm now against the wall for opinions I made, on a drunken rant last Friday. Which I then went back over next Friday and declared live to that chat, I felt like an ass over. I talked about reviewers and how I don't hate them, but sometimes they annoy me, just as I'm pretty sure I annoy others at points. I expressed a different side...but you know what?

You don't see anyone posting that, because for me, all they show is me at my worst, or moments when I talk to loud or yell or preach, and never ONCE when I was down to earth, and those moments occur so often, that the rants and such are a rare thing if anything.
 


 

—Armake21

Gerthonex then replied with:


 
 
First of all, genius, there are multiple types of cancer, and we've found permanent cures for over 20 variations of them. So don't go all emo on me. And with stem cell research, scientists believe that the cure for EVERY type of cancer will be found within 40 years. I feel sorry for you about your loss, but that doesn't change the fact that survival is more important then laughing. I don't even know WHY you brought up that you smoke or that your mother died of cancer, since that has nothing to do with the arguement that cancer research is more important then someone on YT. In fact, it only supports MY side of the arguement on how important it is to find a cure. That's why its so important, so more people don't have to suffer the same fate as your mom. And I don't see why you'd knowingly condemn yourself to lung cancer. Frankly that's a bit fucked up.

And if you really did supposedly mess up, why not come out onto YT and say it, or say it to Jericho himself. And Goose's interpretation of you is the opinion shared by multiple people. And this isn't the first time you've acted like an ass. In your reply to some guy spamming your channel, you said that you'd kill him if you ever met him. You were perfectly sober then.

And you've taken multiple donations to pay for your lap top that broke, and now your asking for people to buy Gears of War 2 for you to review.

Stop making excuses, come out publicly and apologize.
 


 

—Gerthonex


 
 
But then again, since you have more subs and views then me, you make the rules, so anything I say, regardless if its correct or not, is automatically false or incorrect if you deem it so.

And being drunk is a pretty piss-poor excuse. I don't even think you WERE drunk. You didn't show any signs of being under the influence. You were able to site facts perfectly fine, your speech was fluid and even, and you managed to work a computer and a voice recording software. Someone whose being drinking enough to suffer the serious symptoms of alchol (being drunk) can barely stand, let alone operate a computer.

You know whats sad? I'm 13, not even half your age, and I can see through your bull shit. Imagine what other people older then me think of you.

And you still didn't answer my question on how a YouTube user is more important then cancer research.
 


 

—Gerthonex

Sadly, the little bitch never did reply to Gerthonex after that. Oh well.


Armake Sponge-a-thon 2009[edit]

 
 
I can't catch a break...but damned be the people who have the balls to call me a conartist. No you go fuck with other people in that case, and STOP believing the crap you read on ED or otherwise. One Ex-fan wrote half that article, and the other half was written by someone with an agenda, who DOESN'T grasp satire or ironic humor or what ED is all about.
 

 

—Armake21, Completely missing the point of ED

Last Thursday, Poor ol' Marky boy decided his (almost) year old $10,000 Alienware PC wasn't good enough anymore, so he devised an evil plan to eBeg some money out of his remaining fans again using a combination of pretending his machine was broken by not pressing the "on" button properly and taking a leaf out of Chris-chan's big book of gaining sympathy, by BAWWWWing about his pain and mental anguish derived from this very own vile, slanderous ED article that dareth mock thy glorious Marcus. All with a pinch of reverse psychology, with Marcus vailaintly proclaiming over and over that he isn't "scamming" or begging for money, even though in full fact he is.

Should his fans decide not to give him another $10,000 for some other overpriced piece of shit. he threatened to make further videos on his slightly not as good laptop instead.

Now this may be a considerable threat if it wasn't for the fact:

1> He only makes a video once every 5 months.

2> Never finishes reviews/projects he promises to fans (*cough* Action 52, "Downloadable DVD", FarCry 2 *Cough*)

3> His videos would be shit even if he used a fucking NASA computer to edit them.


A Challenger Approaches[edit]

TheGamingGoose: Arch-Nemesis of Armake21.

Recently, a low-life cretin by the name of TheGamingGoose (whom isn't even worthy to lick the dirt off Marcus' boots, let alone a full ED Article), dared have the audacity to mock Armake's gospel comments about the previous statement with his own vile, heathenus video which would later be taken down.



 
 
Most people are expecting a response to a certain video. It isn't going to happen. As for leaving, bailing, or running away- neither is that.

No I'm just going to sit here, and watch as a ton of people expend mass hatred over not even getting what I was saying, and then hating on me for simply explaining something, and further defending myself...in which you'll note the fanboys didn't show up, but yours certainly did, didn't they?
 


 

—Armake21 Butthurt, Et Tu Goosey?


Cloud8745 has enough[edit]

As of the 22nd of November 2008, Cloud8745 made a video on his account, NaturalBornGamers, about how Armake had been treating him and his friends like shit. He revealed that he, Armake, LuizPrower, and a few other people worked for a site that gave them money for making videos, and that Armake had begged and whined the owner of the site for a new $13,000 computer. Of course when Armake got it, he bitched and moaned about it for no real reason (ungrateful cunt). More info is in the video.

Armake21, the Second Coming of Christ[edit]

Armake's hypocrisy even extends to his artwork!

Last Thursday, Fagboys got butthurt when Armake21's account was mysteriously closed and all videos were removed. Marcus claimed that his account had been crucified by his slutty bitch of an ex, but in actual fact he did it himself in an emo sympathy vote.

For two days, he remained silent while his fanboys cried for mercy and revival. But on the third day Armake21 arose from the ashes himself to return to YouTube.

His new account, NicotineAlien, contains re-uploads of the same two year old videos and constant empty threats of never doing any more reviews. His fanboys now wait for more of his awesome game reviews so they can go back to choking on Armake21's cock. He also made a movie "Armake21 vs Action52"; he planned to release it in December of 2008.

Well, he did release it no less than a year late. Since then, it has cured no less than 12,000 insomniacs. Armake21 Suspended from, but comes running back like a bitch to Youtube

It's true! Instead of closing his own account, this time Armake received a banhammer for TOS violation, which youtube hands out like baseball flyers.

Fanboys of Armake21 called the fucking waaaaaahbulance! But it was soon revealed to them by Armake21's personal suck up and cock juicer, Trailerboy415, that Armake21 had moved to a site called Gamevee. Turns out that Gamevee was owned by Got Game, which sponsors the Irate Gamer, and as soon as Armake21 moved to Gamevee, they decided to shut it down. And they kept their word.

After which, not satisfied with ripping off bookitty189 and forum admins, and realizing he had no where to go after Gamevee was shut down so that he'd fuck off from it and he can't design a site for shit, Armake21 finally went back to youtube for the third time. Not learning his lesson for getting suspended for copyright violations, Armake21 made a new youtube account, appropriately named theFAILSessions, where he infringes on the copyrights of other youtube users without their consent.

Marcus: The Bitter Years[edit]

And thus we come to the current chapter in the life of Marcus Spagettio, a world where his hatred and jealousy of the World has turned him into a twisted, bitter Gollum like creature, whom no longer attempts reviews, but instead mocks easy target lol-cows that were completely milked of Lulz by ED years ago.

So instead of coming off as the hilarious satirical film maker which he envisions in his head, he unfortunately just comes across as a fucking terrible Retsupurae rip-off and bitter cunt.

How the Mighty Have Fallen...[edit]

UrinatingTree,
Because hiding behind the shadow of a fat man is Armake's only solace.


Oh, and Marcus, If you're reading this, leeching off others good reputations, by teaming up with them because your own is in tatters isn't a way of reinventing yourself. You'll just drag them down into the primordial shit soup you're currently in as well. The Future

So what does the future hold for our slap-headded egocentric chum? Well suffice to say, as long as someone out there in the video game community can come up with some fad that's half-popular, you can bet old Marky-boy will be following it up six months later with his own half-assed, shitty rendition!

Scratch that, he's back! AGAIN!

DUN-DUN-DUNNNNN! When will it ever work out for him?

A couple of our agents have tried to contact Marcus for comment, but he has yet to return any of our Private Messages.


Dox[edit]

Armake inadvertently confirming his own dox.
Where it lives.

Name: Umberto LaForge / Marcus Sparacio

Home Address: 6953 179th Street, Fresh Meadows NY, 11365

Phone Number: 718-380-0113

E-mail Address: NeoHunter@gmail.com

Instant Messenger: NeoHunter008

Skype: VIIIEightyOne recently changed to NicotineHell after claiming that someone hacked his old one shortly after it was posted here changed back to VIIIEightyOne after claiming to get it back from "the hackers" while admitting that his skype account had never actually been hacked

Something Awful Username: NicotineHell changed to Marc0

UStream Channel: Boxed Entertainment Live

YouTube Accounts[edit]

External Links[edit]


See Also[edit]

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