Plastic Man Can't Make Social Distancing Work Either

From the Supergirl digital comic book published yesterday – a new social distancing ad with the Flash and Plastic Man to accompany all the print ones that DC Comics has been running of late. Has this one been better thought through than the others? Not a bit of it.

Plastic Man Can't Make Social Distancing Work Either.
Plastic Man Can't Make Social Distancing Work Either.

No, the Flash should be able to run faster than any virus, but the shockwaves generated by his speed may make him a super spreader. Six feet won't do it. But also, by performing this action, Plastic Man is himself breaking social distancing, because his arm is a part of him and is all up in the Flash's grill. Also, he's plastic man, and the coronavirus loves a surface. Maybe he could turn himself into a hand sanitiser and then cover himself in the stuff? The Flash should be fast enough to stay away from anyone and everyone without someone having to put their big hand in his face…

Earlier this month, DC Comics ran a socially distancing message with Bruce Wayne and his son Damian Wayne which seemed rather cold since they were family. And may even live in the same mansion. If Damian Cummings can drive 160 miles for his kid, then surely Batman could step forward two metres? The previous version featured Superman and Wonder Woman raising even more interesting questions as Clark gets caught up in Diana's lasso of truth. But had he disinfected his hands? Did Diana have to disinfect it afterwards? And what questions would Wonder Woman ask Superman right now, and were thy planning to knock Batman off his Batbike.

Previous messages have encouraged DC Comics readers to stay in their Fortress Of Solitude or in their Batcave, without considering that many of their readers may not have such huge ice crystalline structures in the Bermuda Triangle, or large subterranean cave dwellings beneath some of the most expensive real estate in Gotham, funded by a hundred billion dollar Wayne foundation.

About Rich Johnston

Head writer and founder of Bleeding Cool. The longest-serving digital news reporter in the world. Living in London, father of two. Political cartoonist.

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