Oakland University
Monday, February 14, 2005

Two families call OU students ‘sons’

By Rebecca Wyatt, OU Web Writer

 

There are many different families from big families to small families to those in between. But in the Oakley household, their truly blended family spreads across international borders.

 

Barbara Oakley, associate professor of engineering, along with her husband, Phillip, and two daughters, Roslyn and Rachel, have adopted two young men from Kosovo, Irfan and Bafti Baftiu. The Oakleys brought Irfan and Bafti, now OU students, to live with them to give them a chance at an education.

 

“A big part of all of this is to give them a great start,” Barbara Oakley said. “That’s all they really needed — the opportunity.”

 

Irfan and Bafti grew up in Kosovo. In 1999, after the war began, they were forced to leave their country along with their father, mother and sister and fled to refugee camps in Macedonia. While in the refugee camps, Irfan and Bafti, who learned English in school, served as interpreters for a group of Yale medical students.

 

Bafti served as an interpreter for one of the doctors, Pam Grim, Barbara Oakley’s sister. To repay him for his help, Grim would take Bafti to a restaurant near the camp. During one of those visits, Grim handed her cell phone to Bafti and introduced him to Oakley, who said she never thought she would meet Bafti.

 

“Little did I know that was far from the truth,” Oakley said.

 

With the help of the Yale medical students from the refugee camp, Irfan and Bafti moved to the United States in 2000 to attend Loomis Cafee Preparatory Board School in Connecticut. Upon graduation, they moved to Michigan and were adopted by the Oakley’s and began college at OU.

 

“We really wanted them to succeed and we realized the best fit for them family-wise was with our family,” Barbara Oakley said.

 

Irfan and Bafti have come to think of the Oakleys as their second set of parents.

 

“We love them like our own parents,” Irfan said.

 

Both Irfan and Bafti have high aspirations for the future. Irfan, an electrical engineering major with a co-op position at Alps Automotive, hopes to graduate soon and would like to complete his master’s degree in business administration and possibly pursue medical school in the future. 

 

Bafti, a political science major, would like to be a diplomat.

 

“My goal is to be an ambassador in Kosovo,” Bafti said. “I’d have the best of both worlds. I’d be in my home country, but working for America.”

 

Both would like to write books about their experiences.

 

“We can’t afford not to be ambitious,” Irfan said.

 

Oakley believes they will make a difference. 

 

“They’re going to be able to help in Kosovo,” she said. “I don’t think there are very many people who could have done what they have done. They are really fine young men.”

 

Having Irfan and Bafti in their family has been an educational experience for the Oakleys. The brothers have given the family new insight into different cultures and religions.

 

“We got to go to Albania with them and learn about cultures with them,” said Rachel, the Oakley’s 13-year-old daughter.

 

The Oakley family also traveled to Irfan and Bafti’s hometown in Kosovo to meet the Baftiu family.

 

“Irfan and Bafti have truly wonderful parents in Kosovo who have trusted us to serve as parents here,” Barbara Oakley said.

 

Rachel and her 15-year-old sister Roslyn have come to think of Irfan and Bafti as the brothers they never had.

 

“I’ve always wanted to have a big brother,” Roslyn said. “It just clicked and they became my brothers.”

 

Irfan and Bafti, who have a younger sister in Kosovo, agree that Roslyn and Rachel have become sisters to them.

 

“When anyone asks us, we have three sisters,” Bafti said.

 

The Oakley family hopes to keep in contact with Irfan and Bafti as they journey through life. However, they understand their lives may take them to other parts of the world, but Barbara Oakley said she knows she helped get them the education they needed and they have taught each other so much.

There are many different families from big families to small families to those in between. But the Oakley household is a truly blended family spreads across international borders. One OU professor and her family have adopted two young men from Kosovo to give them an education at OU.

Created by CareTech Administrator (webservices@caretechsolutions.com) on Monday, February 14, 2005
Modified by CareTech Administrator (webservices@caretechsolutions.com) on Monday, February 14, 2005
Article Start Date: Monday, February 14, 2005