Since the last Olympic cycle, 25-year-old Mariah Bell has experienced both sides of skating — that of triumph and failure.
Following her popular "Hallelujah" free skate, Bell placed second at the 2020 Toyota U.S. Figure Skating Championships. Then, she won the title at 2020 Guaranteed Rate Skate America. But at the 2021 Toyota U.S. Championships, her momentum — earned through years of consistent podium appearances — seemed to come to a screeching halt. A rocky free skate in Las Vegas placed her fifth place one year out from the Olympic Winter Games Beijing 2022.
"The 2020 season ended on such a high and I had never gone into a nationals (U.S. Championships) thinking, 'Mariah could win,'" Bell said. "It was a completely different kind of pressure, and instead of skating to go for every element, I skated in fear."
But Bell said she has learned from her mistakes and is equipped with a refreshed mentality for the 2021-22 season — which starts with new, intentionally crafted programs. Her bold, electric short program is set to music from Lady Gaga's Chromatica album, while her free skate — "Both Sides Now," by Joni Mitchell — will showcase a more reflective and melodic skating style.
As a skater whose reputation is built around lyrical movements and bursts of joy conveyed on powerful crescendos, connecting with music has always been Bell's strength. So, when friend and coach Adam Rippon brought up the idea of a Chromatica mashup for a short program, she was immediately enthusiastic. The cut features a mix of instrumental tracks, sound effects and crowd favorites like "911" and "Rain on Me."
"There are beautiful swells of traditional skating music, which align with my typical style," Bell said. "But during the upbeat portion, there are a lot of Vogue-inspired gestures. As an ally to the LGBTQ+ community, I want to honor where the movements came from and the people who inspired it."
Fans of RuPaul's Drag Race are already vastly familiar with Voguing. Choreographer Cordeo Zuckerman — also known to viewers as Denali Foxx — worked with Bell to pay homage to the Black trans women who invented staccato dance style in the 1970s. (Think: Madonna music video energy with exaggerated, tight upper body movements.)
"In this community, Voguing is a form of expression, an escape," Bell said. "So it's been a challenge to train, but incredibly empowering to pick music that's not only fun, but has such a rich history."
Whether or not Bell will allude to the show with a death drop is to be determined, but the program does feature an accented movement Bell refers to as her "rabbit ears" — a subtle tribute to her pets.
In stark contrast, Bell's free skate is darker and introspective, a window into how she's reflected on the highs and lows of her skating career.
"My short is fast and dynamic, while my free skate is drastically different, almost haunting," Bell said. "It's less about the music and more about how powerful her words are."
Bell almost chose "Both Sides Now" a couple of years ago, but the lyrics and Shae-Lynn Bourne's choreography resonate more with the insight she's gained since last season. At the beginning of the song, Mitchell views clouds as "ice cream castles," but in the next verse, the "feather canons… only block the sun."
"I've been at a high level of skating long enough to connect with both parts, the optimistic and the tougher side," Bell said. "Skating to 'Hallelujah' at nationals (U.S. Championships) was an incredible feeling — but I can still know what it was like the following year, to get off the ice and see myself in fifth."
To Bell, the song does not feel pessimistic. Rather, it illustrates how both of her performances at the 2020 and 2021 Toyota U.S. Championships made her a stronger athlete and person.
"It's all up to interpretation, and I see it as if you have both perspectives, you can choose how and who to be moving forward," Bell said. "When I look back on my career, I'm always going to remember the once-in-a-lifetime skates, but I'm going to be more connected to the days that were harder."
And that perspective is how Bell intends to maintain her mentality shift.
"My parents have always told me, 'It doesn't matter what you do in this sport, it matters who you become,'" Bell said. "And as I get older, that's what I love most about skating."
The 2020 and 2021 free skates represent an angel and devil sitting on her shoulders. Bell, however, has decided the highs and lows have been the best preparation for what she hopes will be her first Olympic Winter Games.
"I needed both experiences to understand that if I welcome mistakes, they're less likely to happen anyway, because I'm enjoying myself rather than focusing on the pressure," Bell said. "I held my breath last year and with these programs, I just feel like I can breathe again."
Bell has also reflected on a quotation from Theodore Roosevelt, emphasizing how success does not equate to critics' approval, but to vigor.
"He essentially says, 'Credit belongs to the man… in the arena,'" Bell said, paraphrasing. "'If he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those… who neither know victory nor defeat.'"
Whether or not Bell gets back on the podium will ultimately be a result of her mental and physical training, and — as for every Olympian — the luck of timing. But as she trains her short program and free skate, she feels optimistic for what lies ahead.
"This season, I want to show up, execute strong elements as consistently as possible and learn my programs so I can express how much they mean to me," Bell said. "But if I'm focusing on the now… Right now, I just feel good."
